Stop Seeking Validation From Everyone
                     Stop Seeking Validation From Everyone
Chaitanya Kumari
Writes informational articles on common ethics, 
cultivating wisdom, being sensible, duties common 
to all along with others on finance, health and 
cultivating wisdom.
Seeking validation from others to a limited extent is acceptable. This is an integral 
element of the sense of belongingness a person experiences in interactions with their 
family and society.
During significant occasions like securing a job or buying a home, we always like to 
share happiness with our social circle. The praises and compliments strengthen our 
bonds with people. However, a serious problem arises when an individual is 
continuously obsessed with seeking validation from others. This is something that 
has to be stopped for the overall well-being.
Over-dependence on external validation – Signs
Generally, a person who lacks self-esteem is heavily dependent on external 
validation. This low level of self-esteem results from many factors such as not 
receiving sufficient affection and encouragement as a child. A constant seeker of 
validation from others displays some signs that cannot be missed.
 They strive to achieve more than what is simply required to make others 
happy.
 They are incapable of making decisions when there is no guidance from 
others.
 They avoid disagreeing with others because they are excessively worried 
about abandonment and rejection.
 When people in the vicinity do not give them attention, they tend to get 
emotionally disturbed.
 They always crave sympathy from others, and for this purpose, they tend to 
fabricate non-existent problems and circumstances. They play the ‘victim 
card.’
Stop seeking validation from others – Tips
As already mentioned, seeking validation in situations genuinely warranting it is 
perfectly normal. But things can go wrong if an individual incessantly desires 
external validation. Their susceptibility to psychological disorders such as 
depression and anxiety escalates. The feeling of low self-esteem plummets 
further. Thus, steps must be initiated to check this tendency to the maximum 
possible extent.
 Firstly, an individual must be constantly aware of their actions and the 
corresponding results. This awareness will make it easier to notice any 
improvements, which, in turn, will boost their self-esteem, reducing the 
need to incessantly seek validation from others.
 If people practice techniques like mindfulness meditation, they can keep 
their emotions balanced. Additionally, this form of meditation helps 
individuals recognize their own worth. As a result, they will be better 
equipped to make decisions that align with their goals, no longer feeling 
bound by the need for validation from others.
 One has to discard the habit of trying to make people happy. It has to be 
understood that “people-pleasing” is almost impossible to achieve. Someone 
or the other always has complaints against you, regardless of how good you 
are. It’s equally relevant that a person begins to politely refuse requests, 
which could cause some inconvenience to them. If people become 
judgmental, it is their problem. That does not reflect your worthiness.
 We should stop comparing ourselves with others, and feel that we are 
inferior. The circumstances in each person’s life are different. Hence, what 
works for others might not be appropriate for you. Assess your worth only 
in relation to situations specific to your life and how you are handling them.
 Drastically cut down social media consumption. On these platforms, people 
present a sugar-coated version of themselves filtering out all the negative 
aspects. People who want validation from others often become much more 
depressed upon seeing all that. They feel that everyone else, except for 
them, is having a fulfilling life.
About Living Smartly
Living-smartly.com is a website that publishes information specifically focused on 
helping people to make right choices in their every day challenges. Living Smartly 
provides smart tips & insights that covers all aspects of daily living such as general 
health & dental health, philosophy, social skills, technology, wellness, gifts etc.
        Thank you for spending your precious time in reading this article!